Sunday, July 27, 2014

Relationships: Can You Sustain a Healthy Relationship with Your Ex?

Picture found on ModernFemaleCentral.com
When you think about relationships, do you think of a life filled with Exs? If you are some people then this answer is yes, but some people do not believe that you can carry a healthy relationship with your ex, especially if you broke up due to detrimental factors.

My answer regarding carrying on a relationship with an ex  is that it can be done; however you have to be very honest with the current person you are in relationship with so no one gets hurt. When I talk about hurt, I am not just talking about hurt emotional, but physically too. If your previous relationship was a very violent one where you had to get a restraining order against the person, it is only fair that you are up front with the current person you are in a relationship with so he or she will have a choice in the matter whether or not to stay with you. What some people fail to realize is that harmful situations tend to happen when the other person is hiding information from the other person, secretly carrying on a current relationship with their ex, or misrepresenting information that could harm someone.

In my current findings, I have found that some people tend to complain heavily about their ex when they are still emotionally attached to the person. It is like they have yet to move away from the hurt that the person caused them in the past that they bring that same emotion into their future relationships. Although these people complain about their exs, they will follow them on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other social media websites. So in reality, it's like their mouth speaks false hope because their actions are not aligning with what they are saying.

I have an acquaintance who told me a couple of years ago that her ex was very violent, irresponsible, and just detrimental to the health of their relationship. The individual was so violent that my friend had to get a restraining order against him. The unbelievable part regarding my friend was that she sustained a relationship with her ex by talking to him on the telephone, following him on Instagram, Facebook, and other websites.

I honestly do not understand the reason for her to maintain such a relationship that she still considers detrimental to her health, especially when she is currently involved with someone else. Either she is in denial of still loving this person or maybe she has exaggerated the truth just a wee bit. I am definitely not telling her who she can and cannot associate herself with, I just don't want innocent people to get hurt because of her current choices. The fact of the matter is that my acquaintance still cares about this individual the way she keeps discussing the person and giving the person all her energy. My acquaintance needs to be true to herself. If she still wants to be with the individual, just be open, honest, and let your current boyfriend know about the situation. It is only fair to him so he will know where he stands.

~Relationships are about honestly, not the misrepresentation of the truth. Start living in your truth.

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