Recently, I was told by a co-worker that she could not believe that I was the youngest of my siblings. She told me that I did not act as a typical younger sibling. I immediately thought “people’s opinions of the younger sibling must be universal. Why is this? And what was the particular way that younger siblings acted?” I ultimately knew the answers to my own questions because I had dealt with them earlier on in life.
You have to know that being the youngest of the family is not an easy job because people do perceive the youngest to act in a certain manner. Honestly, it’s not like “The baby of the family” wakes up each morning and say “I’m going to act in a manner to distinguish myself as the younger sibling of the family.” Sometimes our actions are attention seeking. We were the last of mom and dad’s kids, so we sometimes seek attention because we were use to having the spotlight. It can also be said that some of us had no immediate responsibilities to take care of, such as taking care of a younger sibling, being the bigger brother or sister, or anything else that came with protecting someone we loved. While older brothers and sisters learned this incredible skill early on, younger siblings had to find other ways to gain the skill.
At times, our understanding of the statement “The world doesn’t revolve around you,” does not really hit home until we are older adults. This is sad, but often true. Take reality star, Tamar Braxton for example. She is the youngest of six children born to Evelyn Braxton and Michael Braxton, Sr. As the show displays, Tamar can be a little domineering at times. In previous episodes, her personality rubbed her sisters the wrong way because of her comments and actions. Although some of Tamar’s actions and comments were irrational, I could definitely relate to her. I could relate to her emotionality, her feeling of having to always defend herself from her older siblings, and being misunderstood. See, previously I was the same way. I remember in my early twenties, I often felt misunderstood. I had sisters, but no one to talk to. A mouth, but no one to hear me. A purpose, but no one to understand me. I felt as though I was all alone with no one to take up for me when accusations were made against me. Who would stand by me and show me that it would be ok? Me, that’s who!Finally in my late twenties, I started to live for myself and no one else. This is when many doors opened up to me in the form of relationships, friendships, and a feeling inside of me that it was ok to be me. I felt more comfortable in myself, doubted myself less, and knew where I was going. I honestly believe that when I found comfort in myself, others started to see the same comfort that radiated inside of me. It was like my hands had been unbound, feet unshackled, and mind liberated. See, I was a hostage within my own home because like my co-worker who believed the youngest sibling acted in a particular way, I believed I was treated in a particular way. That notion is what kept me from progressing toward my purpose. I can say that I longer feel that way because I do not want to be in the business of making thoughts reality. I conclude by saying that as a child, I was spoiled and a bit selfish. Do you think if I was presented with the opportunity to change who I was as a child, I would do it? Not at all! I truly believe that we all go through certain things in life because we are being prepared to embark upon like experiences. My knowledge of my past choices and activities could very well help shape someone else’s life. While I am unable to change my sisters’ previous thoughts about me, I am able to change their future thoughts. We definitely have much better relationships than when I was younger, which I attribute to the shift in understanding each other as we grew up and became women. We now have experienced life a little bit more and have something to share with each other. I must say that I love these women!
~ I choose the liberated and often conscious mind